So remember in my last post how I said I want to move away?
Well, I really really want to now.
I'm so tired of everything in my life right now. Moving away all by myself far away would be an adventure. I'd get to know myself better and become more self-reliant and responsible. I wouldn't have to worry about pleasing anyone, it'd just be me. No one to pretend for. No one to hurt. No one to be hurt by. No one to annoy or be annoyed by.
I guess that sounds really selfish. But today I realized that I live my life trying to please others. Not trying to suck up to people but just trying to always genuinely be on everyone's good side, whether it means sacrificing my own happiness and dignity or not. Well I'm tired of that.
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2 comments:
This probably sounds cliche, but: I know excactly how you feel!! I get like that all the time, where I just want to leave everything behind and run. It happened a lot in high school. And this summer. I just feel trapped, and like I'm not going anywhere, bogged down with things to do and people, etc. It stinks. You should come to Disneyland with me. It will make all your problems go away.
Hmm... Lisa you're a good person, and instead of trying to please everyone else, or even trying to please yourself, the only one you really need to please is Heavenly Father, and you know he loves you. Don't worry about everyone else, don't worry about pleasing anyone else, they aren't worth it. So, if you want, you can push me down in the mud and make me ANGRY, if I deserve it that is, otherwise that'd be unChristlike and I'd pull you down with me. Ummm.... yeh what was my point? Yes, we can run away. Let's run away to.... Idaho... yes, Idaho.
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