Thanks to everyone who commented on my last post, I appreciate your support and love. I'd comment you all back individually but I'm too lazy/tired. And yes Lauren I will try to call you soon :]
So Stephen and I broke up. It was okay, it ended up being mutual. But it sucks. I can't even describe how much it sucks. I hardly missed him when we were dating and went for days without seeing each other. But now I miss him like crazy, despite the fact that I've seen him at least once every day since we broke up. I don't get it. I've cried every day. I've talked to him about it. He said it's hard for him too. I told him that I guess the hardest part for me is realizing and accepting the fact that all we are is friends now....and he said that's hard too. He's cried. I told him that I felt stupid because it seems like he's already over me and I don't know why it's not so easy for me, and he told me, "No...trust me I'm not...I'm just trying to deal with it." I'm glad/sad for him. But I can't deal with it. Blaahhh this just sucks...I don't know what to do about it. I know I should pray because...okay this is the most ridiculous logic in the world I know...but I don't want to pray about it because then I might start feeling better, and if I start feeling better that means I'm getting over Stephen. And I don't want to be over him.
He was here for like 7 hours today, 4-11....He came over to watch the Super Bowl and have dinner with my family (ps I've never been into football but I was SO mad we lost!!!...). And while he was here things were perfectly fine. I wasn't sad, we goofed around, it was like the good times we had while we were dating. Actually, it was like we were dating again, minus the kisses. But within ten minutes after he left I just felt so depressed. This is terrible, even if I seem happy, if I'm not with him I'm really really sad. I don't get this
Sunday, February 1, 2009
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4 comments:
One word Lisa. Pray. You need to feel better and be happy. I don't want to preach to you, cuz I don't really know what you're feeling right now. All I know is that the Lord is there for us if we just ask for his help and comfort. I'm proud of you for being brave and doing it. I love you!
~Frhonda~
Lisa, it's totally natural to feel that way after you've broken it off with someone you care about. When you love someone, you don't all of a sudden stop loving them, life doesn't work that way. It's so hard, and all I want to do is just give you a hug.
And as my father always says to me, "If you don't feel like praying, pray until you do." I think Brigham Young originally said that, but it always makes me think of my dad. I know this might sound preachy, but in the long run, listening to and communicating with your Heavenly Father about what's going on in your life is the most important thing in life. That's a hard lesson to learn, and I'm still working on it.
Also, just to let you know, getting over Stephen doesn't mean that you won't care about him anymore, or that you weren't validated or sincere in your feelings when you were dating. You definitely were. Life and the Lord just have other plans for you.
Sorry that was really long, but keep your chin up. Love you so, so much. =]
P.S. Mew was playing while I wrote this and it made me happy.
lisa i kind of understand know why you in so much pain and the praying part i just find it hard sometimes. But your are on of the most amazing persons i know and everyone loves being around you.Your cute, spunky, crazy and full of energy. and i admire you for the way you are!
Lisa, there is a really book called "How Do You Know When You're Really in Love?" by Robert K. McIntosh that is really good that I think might help you if you want to borrow it. In it he has a chapter about "Breaking Up without Breaking Down" Part of it says (this is going to be long):
"How do you get over breaking up? Surviving an ended relationship is somewhat akin to surviving the death of a loved one. There needs to be a time of mourning and grieving - a time to recognize that the relationship is over. The pain can be very real and very intense; however, the hurt will eventuallly pass. President Hinckley has a motto: "Things work out, they always do." So it is with ended relationships. You need to believe that things will be okay and will work out....
The ultimate peace during these times comes from the Lord. How do we receive this peace? By intensifying our scripture study, our personal prayers, and our service to others."
Lisa, everything WILL be okay, and WILL work out for your good! It's okay to cry, let it out, and then turn to the Lord like never before. He will lift your burden.
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